spotifylistener:

when i have a kid i’m going to make his middle name “lazy” or something so that when ppl yell at him like “holy frick you’re so lazy” he can just be like “yeah well lazy’s my middle name” and swag the fuck outta there

undesired-pageblood:

emotionalfossil:

bubonickitten:

0ptimuspenguin:

ambieheartsturtlep0rn:

capitolresident:

Let’s play a game called ‘Stay up late and hate myself in the morning’

‘on a school night’ edition

with unlockable bonus round ‘finals week’

expansion pack: ‘don’t do anything productive’

DLC: ‘Client Projects Edt’

Survival Mode: Parents ON

• That’s a PERIOD, NOT A COMMA
• That’s a COMMA, NOT A PERIOD
• Why the hell can’t you pronounce that word?
• THE TEACHER JUST CORRECTED YOU WHY’D YOU GET IT WRONG AGAIN?!?!?!
• Can I sleep?
• If you can’t read, why’d you raise your hand?
• You can’t pronounce THAT word?
• WHAT THE HELL
• The fuck you like long ass paragraphs for
• My skin’s crawling
• Oh god not him, his voice sounds like a dying nail on a dying chalkboard
• You skipped a line
• LOL what was that?
• I don’t even. 

(Source: youcanbethecaptain)

njena:

i think the reason perfume commercials are so weird is because they have to advertise a smell without using smells

pizza:

do you ever think a thing and ur like if i told anyone that they’d think i was nuts and then you see it as a text post with like 50,000 notes cos sometimes i do and thats why i luv you guys